Where Is My Mind?
December 26th, 2007Sorry guys, I’ve been really neglecting Moose River lately, haven’t I? It’s not because I’m tired of working on it or anything. Truth be told I’ve been feeling depressed for like… a good part of 2007. Like ever since I came back home from Otakon back in July, I’ve just been going in and out of a weird depression. Sometimes I think I’m over it and I actually get work done, but then I just fall right back into it without any warning, and nothing gets done for a whole week. This depression really makes it hard for me to want–or even care–to do anything. I haven’t cleaned my room in hella long, my car is a mess, I barely have any energy to go to work. I don’t even care that it should actually bother me that I don’t care about anything. On my off days from work I spend it doing nothing, which in turn depresses me because I’m bored to death. Now that I think about it, I don’t think I’ve had a single week (seven days straight) where I wasn’t depressed, in a malise, or otherwise blue. Furthermore, I have a real problem of not being conscious of stuff that happens to me like this, so I don’t even notice that I’ve been depressed for a long as I have until I really sit down and think about it.
However, I think I know what the problem is. I’m gonna be testing this theory fairly soon; hopefully it does the trick and I get back to “normal”. I just hope the new year brings a symbolic change to my emotional fortunes and I get over this sort of lousy rut I’ve been in for the last five months or so.